Speeding, accelerating into oblivion,
I scream, and in the darkness
My voice is suffocating
And I can’t breathe,
The air is stifling
And the ferocious warmth
Dries my eyes,
Lids close tight shut.

He hollers for me after dusk,
Menacing, stock of mean tenderness,
Leans back and gives me control,
Closing his eyes, imagining.
Gripping me with vulnerability
And his concept of love
Which leaves me paralysed
And blind.

He smiles and I drown in sorrow
For all of the memories.
He promises to straighten out.
Persuasion for moving moments.
He promises heaven,
But delivers me daily hell.
He is not mine to suffer
The nightmares alone.

Wonder if he knows, now
My heart beats for only me.

*

He catches me on Mondays
Like a star, temporary and constant.
A new diamond, a new sky
Like a butterfly, trapped and free,
Flitting between pollen types
And numb telephone signals.
Hiding behind giant chairs,
Typing his speak to me.

He smiles and I drown in his eyes.
When he blinks, I breathe.
Specks of introspection,
Keeps his thoughts to himself.
Setting out boundaries
We want to break,
Keeping a distance
That keeps us apart.

In love with a boy,
Twenty metres away.
Lids, gently open.
Tears, wet my eyes.

And the succumbing heat
Brings me peace,
I’m breathing,
My voice is speaking,
Speeding, accelerating

Into the first day of,
The rest of my life.